Based on a true story by Acid Zen Wonder Paint


My sister loves intelligent debate. She just can’t get enough ofwell-informed discussion between two clear-thinking and intelligentpeople.

Usually, she will try this bag of baloney crap-on-a-stick with me.

In order to curb such ridiculous behavior, I make a point ofdeliberately providing frustrating and ignorant replies to herlegitimate societal queries. When asked about my feelings, Iwill respond with “moo cows” and then pretend to be her alarm clock, letting out monotone beeps. If asked to commiserate in a girly fashion about a girly topic, I will once again respond with “moo cows,” only inthis case I will begin singing Goldigger in a mock, off-key falsetto.

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